Hi, my name is Gemma and I am from the UK.
I first got into web design after helping a friend on her fansite. I had no clue what I was doing at the time and with her help, I learnt a lot and enjoyed it so decided to take it a step further and teach myself some more things. I then started designing in my spare time, just to give me something else to do and keep my mind busy, as well as give myself some extra cash to live on due to not being able to work.
I am a full time carer for my mum, something I have been doing for more than half my life now, since I was 15 after she suddenly started to get very sick. She had a few health issues and then out of nowhere, woke up and her arm was completely numb and as the day went on, it started to affect the rest of her body. She was rushed to the hospital where she stayed for many months, paralyzed from the neck down. She was told she caught a bug and was later diagnosed as having Guillain-Barre Syndrome – a rare condition where your immune system attacks the peripheral nerves. It took roughly 2 years before she learnt to walk again but she struggles daily and can only walk for a few minutes at a time. She also has a deteriorating lumbar spine so uses a wheelchair a lot now and is in constant pain. Her health has continued to get worse over the years but I won’t bore you with any more of that.
More recently, in December 2022, I got very sick myself and was rushed into hospital, suspected as needing surgery. 16 hours, lots of morphine and tests later, I was sent home with meds to try help the pain I was in. Then 2 days later, I was back at the hospital, but for my mum – we found out she has cancer of the womb and needs a hysterectomy but due to her health, has been told the surgery is too dangerous for her right now. It’s a waiting game at the moment while they figure out what to do.
March 17, 2023 – the morning of my birthday, I got sick again. I was in an extreme amount of pain, same issue as before. I spent the whole day not being able to move, crying in agony. Went back to the hospital and needed more tests. We still don’t know what is wrong but touch wood, I’ve been feeling okay for a few weeks now.
Life is very stressful at the moment, I pretty much spend most of my spare time sitting crying, feeling very lonely, keeping my feelings to myself because I don’t want to give my mum anything extra to worry about. Not sure I’m doing a very good job though as she’s noticed and thinks I may be having some depression and anxiety – she’s not wrong!
I decided to write this down, just for myself really, not sure I will ever let anyone read it…who knows! It’s just me rambling on really.